LAUGHABLE QUOTES BY SOME
NIGERIAN LEADERS
1. “We want to thank the president
for bringing Facebook to Nigeria.” –
Information Minister, Labaran
Maku.
2. “You press men, you always say
there are no minerals in Kano. We
have Coca-Cola, Fanta, Mirinda and
the newly invented Sprite.” – Barkin
Zuwo
3. “Foreign investors should ignore
Boko Haram and invest in Nigeria.”
– GEJ
4. “I will water your school and fire
your school.” – Orji Uzoh Kalu
5. “Nigerians, don’t panic. Terrorist
attack is everywhere … maybe it is
our turn.” – GEJ
6. “I will rather kill myself than
commit suicide.” – Dame Patience
Jonathan
7. “I founded this school for the
masses and the school fees is
850,000 naira.” – Atiku Abubakar
8. “Until I see someone eating out
of the gutters before I believe there
is poverty in Nigeria.” – Umaru
Dikko
9. “Telephone is not meant for the
poor. ” – David Mark
10. “The worth of a child born and
bred in Nigeria cannot be
compared to that in the United
States.” – Yakubu Gowon
11. “School is not meant for the
poor, only for the rich.” – Ikedi Ikiri
Ohakim
12. “At 50, Britain is still battling
with King Arthur and the knights of
the round table so Nigeria is not
doing too badly.” – Diezeani
Allison-Madueke
13. “Even Jesus Christ cannot
conduct a free and fair election in
Nigeria.” – Olusegun Obasanjo
14. “The corp members where
destined to die, nobody can run
away from destiny.” – Mallam Isa
Yaguda, Governor, Bauchi State
15. “On behalf of 20 million naira, I
donate my family” – Dame Patience
Jonathan
16. “We, the PDP did not win this
election, I have gone to church to
confess, I gave them money and
they called the result.” – Chris Uba
17. “I want to commend the
doctors and nurses for responding
to treatment.” – Dame Patience
Jonathan
18. “I can see camera people. Are
they going to televise us alive?” –
Dame Patience Jonathan

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